Monday, July 27, 2009

Kane the Paniolo Buys a New Dress for Annie!

Howdy Y’all! It’s yer old pal Kane the Paniolo checking in. I just had to poke my head in and tell y’all about sumthin special goin on. Seems today marks one year since I came to Pibble Creek so Ms. Lynn and The Yankee are having an Annie Versary party. I’m not quite sure what Annie’s Versary has to do with anything. Heck, I don’t even know what a Versary is, but figure it must be a pretty dress if Ms. Annie celebrates getting one every year, but I shore am glad she gets that dress ‘cause I learned it means that I get presents and cake too! That sounds like a purty good deal so I might just saves up my wages and buy Ms. Annie a new dress a few times a year ‘cause I really like cake.

Now it has been one helluva year, what we me havin to get all dem worms out of my heart and going to that Neuter Party and getting robbed. So much has happened so fast. My, how time flies. Once I got dem worms out of my heart, I’ve been trying real hard to be a good ranch hand at Pibble Creek. I always help Ms. Lynn when she works in dog corral but there must have been some trouble brewing ‘cause I heard her and The Yankee say they was declaring war on The Chiggers and The Ticks. I’m not even sure who they are but they must be two gangs of bandits ‘cause for a few hours each day, Ms. Lynn puts all us dogs in our bunks with our vittles and then she goes out to battle them. She also puts these funny smellin’ drops on us each month to keep them away from us and they must work as I ain’t never seen one of those varmits yet.

I g
uess Ms. Lynn and The Yankee must want to get a good look if those hooligans are headed our way ‘cause each time we come out of our bunks I notice that more tree branches have been trimmed real high like and more and more of that tall grass in the meadow has been hacked away. I shore hope we’re winning that there war ‘cause I don’t want them Chiggers and Ticks making it to the house and eatin up all my cake!

In addition to all the stuff that happened to me this last year, Ms. Lynn up and caved again and let another convict join us at Pibble Creek. Wouldn’t you just know it, it was one of those darn juvenile delinquents that seem to be so much trouble. I thought the Rangers shipped all dem delinquents up North but I heard dis little whipper snapper couldn’t go there because there was something wrong with the way she looks. Darn if that didn’t give me flashbacks to the time I met that drunken Dr. Baker (you know the one that didn’t bake nuthin) and she wanted to hook me up with the homely girl Ivy.

So I was pretty worried about what kind of ugly girl Ms. Lynn and the Yankee
might be bringing home to Pibble Creek but once I saw her, I figured out da problem straight away. See, that girl ain’t homely, you just can’t tell if she’s a dog or a cow. Ms. Ipo, who was at Pibble Creek before I came, has that same darn de zees. I think I got a touch of it too from my mama’s side but shore am glad I don’t have as many spots as those two ladies. I was careful not to stare and didn’t say nuthin’ cause I know that would be unpolite like. I’ve heard of Cowgirls before but didn’t know they weren’t allowed up in Yankeeville.

I’ve been getting on swell with Ms. Nani and that old cow poke Koa. Ms. Nani likes to gallavant with me once in a while but she has bad hips so I take it easy with her on the dance floor. Koa is a cranky old c
oot but he’s taught me a bunch and he just likes to lay under a shade tree or whittle a new pipe now and then and not bother nobody. Dem Cowgirls are both crazy and I’m startin’ to think that the reason they aren’t allowed in Yankeeville ain’t so much their looks but that de zees they got must do sumthin funny to their brains.

Well, that there about covers most of my missing adventures since I last popped in for a chat by the fire. I’m going to go get ready for Annie’s party now. I can’t wait to meet her and just hope I don’t get no cake frosting on her purty new dress.

Kane Agape aka The Paniolo
w/Lynn, Koa, Nani, Ipo, Lilo and the Wiley Cats!

PS: You can read chronicles of his first few weeks at Pibble Creek written in his own words:

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